There are many ways men and women differ. But here is a few points in how the escape themselves in order to feel better.
Men are notorious for going into their caves and dealing with their problems alone where as women like to talk about their feelings and resolve their problems with help from others.
Men and women are very different in problem solving.
They think differently and react a lot differently to similar situations.
So here are a few points on how men deal and a few points on how women deal:
A little explanation on how men are like rubber bands and women are like waves. From the book : “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus ” – John Gray, PhD
How men deal:
- Men ten to pull away and deal with their problems alone. ( In their cave)
- They try to fix the problems by coming up with solutions
- They don’t seek help unless they cannot find a way to do it themselves
- Men get so close that eventually the feel the need to pull back. to feel anonymous and able to deal with problems by themselves.
- Men need to feel loved and cared for but also need to feel like they can be alone
- They cannot feel to dependent on one person and when they do they will automatically pull away like a rubber band but remember they will always come back when they are ready
How women deal:
- Women deal with their problems in many ways:
- One way is to talk about their feelings and all they really need is for someone to listen
- They go into a well, where their self-esteem is low and they need encouragement to love and care again
- They talk to friends and family
- Here the key is women need to talk about their feelings to feel better
- When a women feels loved her self-esteem rises and falls like a wave crashing up and down
- She feels loved but when her self-esteem crashes it is hard for her to love and care for others so she crashes into a well.
- In her well she needs to hit rock bottom and be filled with love from her partner to replenish the well and then her need to love and care will return
- When a women goes into her well she needs the support of others more then ever and sometimes it will seem as if she is worse but you need to realize she has to hit rock bottom before she can come back from air
- So listening is key when a women crashes down
Now this is just a brief look at a few points John Gray makes in his book. Women and Men are truly different creatures and in order to live in harmony together they need to understand each other.
I would recommend checking out John Grays Book, it is very insightful and has many good points. You will learn a lot about your partner and little things you can do to make your relationship work better and become stronger.
Little things you have being doing to upset each other may be easily understood and John Gray has some quick easy fixes that can help solve this problems.
I have learnt a lot from this book and am only on Chapter 8.
I did find Chapter 6 and 7 very interesting oh how ” Men are like rubber bands ” and “How women are like waves.” I think that if you like reading and are interested in learning on how to improve a relationship you to would find this book helpful.
That is my little spiel for today. 🙂
Until Next Time,